Ugh

The weekend was pretty nice. On Saturday, we went to the animal farm and spray park. Admission was free, so that was one of the best parts. We’re scraping the bottom of the barrel this week, so free was the only way to go over the weekend. Emerson had a nice time. We were there for a couple of hours. Sometimes, I wish the activities lasted longer. His attention span is pretty good, but obviously not as great as an older kiddo. I always set out to make these plans a whole day thing, but it usually doesn’t end that way. Anyway, afterwards, we didn’t do much. We visited my parents, then hung at home the rest of the day.

On Sunday, we went to the waterpark using our passes, therefore we spent $0. Afterwards, we went to my parent’s house for our 4th of July cookout. Emerson was driving me nuts. Actually, no. My dad was driving me nuts. He gets too paranoid. If Em even walks 50ft around the grill, my dad starts FLIPPING. Chill! It is just so hard to relax when someone is that paranoid. Trust me, he isn’t a dummy. He didn’t touch the grill not one time. Then, anytime he’d go near the screen door, my dad would have a cow saying that he was going to slam his fingers in the door. Seriously, drives me insane. Anytime he took a bite of food, “He’s gonna choke!” What?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So then I start getting mad at Emerson and telling him to stop when he isn’t even really doing anything wrong. It was just a frustrating day when it was supposed to be relaxing. It was too cold for us to even swim, so that made it worse. We had nothing to do in their yard. They have no toys. We ended up staying until about 630pm. We did fireworks when it was still light out.  We still had fun, but it was aggravating at times.

On Monday, Emerson and I headed to the mall. Yes, I know. It was the 4th of July, but it was rainy out, so no pool time. I found a gift card in my wallet, so I took him to Giggles and Smiles to play. He had a blast! He also played in the mall play place too, then we went to lunch.  It turned out to be a really nice day. I put Em down for a really late nap in hopes that he’d be refreshed enough for fireworks. He was! We headed to my sister’s house after cooking out at hour house to light sparklers. Fireworks started around 930pm. We had an amazing spot. Em was cool for the first half, then he started to get wild. He didn’t feel like sitting anymore. We kept passing him back and forth between our laps though and he made it all the way through. I’m sure he’s tired today from being out so late. My sister is picking him up from daycare because I have to work late.

This week, we’re not doing much. I don’t get paid until Friday. We don’t have much planned over the next two weeks either. We’re going to the waterpark and swimming at my parent’s house. That should be okay though. The weather will be much hotter this weekend, so going to the waterpark will be better. I barely even got into the water on Sunday.

I’m trying to put together a sensory room for Emerson. Emerson has Proprioceptive and Vestibular sensory needs. I’m trying to create a sensory diet for home, so that his appetite is fulfilled enough to leave certain behaviors behind. The aggression and constant movement are driving me absolutely insane. He is so rough with the dog and kids at school. On top of that, it is extremely hard for him to sit still beyond any normal level. You can see the change in him when we’ve been hanging around the house too long. I’m talking 3 hours into a morning and he’s a nightmare. Punching, hitting, kicking me/the dog. Extreme unruly behavior mixed with unsafe movements like climbing and jumping. I cannot even begin to think about what life will be like in the winter time. At least now I can take him out to do some things. I realize there are a lot of things lacking in our home to fulfil what he’s seeking. He has a ton of toys, but most aren’t really geared to what he needs. He needs the physical aspects. Playing with trucks and cars isn’t going to give him that. He needs to be able to crash/jump without getting hurt, and to swing/climb in a safe manner. I’m hoping once we have the capabilities in our home, then maybe he will get enough of what he is seeking. Working with the OT has been great, BUT she only sees him once a week. I haven’t adjusted anything in our home since he began his therapy, and I know they haven’t adjusted much at daycare. If we aren’t updating the way we approach this situation, then he isn’t ever going to overcome it. While it is extremely frustrating for me, I need to accept it and embrace the change. Some kids have too much sensory stimulation, while others have too little. He just isn’t getting what he needs daily.

Trust me, it has been extremely hard for me to come to terms with this. No one wants to see their child struggle, or to admit that they do have an issue. I chalked it up to typical 2 year old behavior, but I am seeing that it is not. I can’t play the blame game on his age all of the time. For some things, yes, but this is not one of those circumstances. Sometimes, I ask “Why me and why my kid?” but then I realize that all kids struggle in some way. I’m glad that we’re working with him now while his brain is so malleable. Hopefully we can teach him better ways to cope. I just wish I’d see major improvement already. I did notice that his speech is coming along more, but it is still very much behind. I know he becomes so frustrated when he has to repeat himself just for me to not understand. Trust me, I try. It eats me up daily that I can’t understand my own kid. I know he will get there, but it still hurts to watch.

His three month evaluation is due at the end of this month. I am curious to see what the therapist have to say about his growth. I thought we’d be a bit more ahead of where we are now, but I guess some change is better than no change at all. He is definitely giving his mama a run for her money. My ideas for the sensory room are pretty basic. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy. We already have a big, yoga ball and a tunnel that he can crawl through. I want to get a toddler trampoline, some kind of a rocking chair, a small scooter, ball pit, and a couple of bean bags that he can crash and jump into. As we go along, I’m sure I’ll add some other things that’ll aid in what he’s lacking. Pinterest has been my best friend lately. I’ve gotten so many great ideas from there. I just hope this helps. I plan on purchasing the trampoline this weekend. I found one on sale that has a handlebar for safety.

I am sure a lot of you are reading this thinking I am nuts, but he isn’t your child. You aren’t with him to see the struggle and to see him in motion. As moms, it is our duty to help our kiddos. That’s exactly what I plan on doing. I’ll update you all to let you know how things progress.

Summer bucket list

Yesterday, I planned an impromptu trip to Kennywood (amusement park). They had a superhero event that ran through yesterday. My company was still offering discounted tickets, so I bought one for myself. Emerson is free, so it made sense to go. It was super fun! I left work a little bit early, so that we could make it there before 5. We stayed for about 3 hours. Emerson had a great time riding all of the rides. The lines were so short too, so there was no wait.

Afterwards, we stopped at my parent’s house, so that I could borrow some stuff from my mom. I accidentally left my gym bag on the bus yesterday with all of my make-up, deodorant, curling iron, hair brush, gym shoes/clothes, all of my Tupperware containers from my lunch, and my magic bullet cups too. I was so upset. My phone charger and sun glasses were also in that bag along with my gym towel. My mom gave me some make-up, a hair brush, and deodorant to make it through today. When I got on the bus this morning, a woman told me that my bag was found and turned in. I called port authority today and they have my bag. Emerson and I will pick it up tonight. It sucks to have to make a trip after work, but it is what it is. I have to get my stuff.

After yesterday’s trip to Kennywood, we’re poor until payday next Friday, July 8th. The good news is we have some nice, free things planned for the weekend. We’re doing the spray park on Saturday and Sandcastle on Sunday. With our passes, we won’t have to pay any money at all. That’ll be enough excitement to get us through.  We have a lot of other fun things planned coming up, so it’ll be fine. We can’t do something every day. Sometimes, you just have to enjoy what you already have.

Our bucket list is coming along so nicely though. Below are the items we’ve checked off already.

Kennywood (twice)

The Zoo

Our Local Spray Park

The Lake

Sandcastle Water Park (twice)

Kerber’s Dairy

Sarris Candy Factory

Mt Washington Overlook/South Side fountain

Upcoming adventures include:

The better Spray Park

More trips to Sandcastle

Idewild Amusement and Water Park

Living Treasures Animal Park

Indoor/Outdoor Water Park

JellyStone Park

The Wave Pool

Boat Cruise

Build-A-Bear

The Regatta

The Bubble Run

The Color Run (Emerson isn’t doing this one with me though. This is just for mommy)

I’m excited.  We don’t have much planned over the next two weeks though. We’re doing Sandcastle a couple of times and the Wave Pool. The Color Run is on the 16th, so we’re organizing a trip with friends to Sandcastle for after that are running with me. I think I am going to sneak our Build-a-Bear trip in somewhere. It’ll shake things up a bit and I think he will really enjoy doing that. I am just trying to make sure that we have some fun things planned periodically. I want Emerson to have a fun summer, but this is also for me too. I do get joy out of doing all of these things too.

I was having a bit of a heated discussion with someone the other day regarding doing things for me. They assume because I am not going to a club/bar, that it means I am not doing things for myself. All of these excursions just aren’t for Emerson. Its things that I want to do too. I like going to the pool, zoo, amusement parks, etc. It’s fun for me. I could do more things without him, but I prioritize and I realize that we do not have funds to do separate things all of the time. I am happy I get to do the color run with my sister and friends. That’s a treat to myself this summer. I do things after he is in bed though. I rent movies, read a book, etc. I also consider anytime that I work out just for me. I have been slacking MAJORLY on that lately. I need to get back into it. I had planned on running yesterday, but skipped lunch to leave early for Kennywood. I have no running shoes today because I left my bag on the bus last night, to today is ruined too. I’m shooting for tomorrow though.  Anyway, I don’t think drinking defines having a good time, or doing things for yourself. I just don’t feel like spending my money, or time in that manner. I’d rather go see a movie, hike, do something outdoorsy, go to dinner, etc. All things that have nothing to do with being out late with drunk people. It doesn’t interest me anymore and I think a lot of people have a hard time grasping that. I am not the same person that I once was. I was very social before, and loved going out. I had the luxury of being that way. I had my time and it was great. I fully experienced my 20s, but now, I am at a different part in life. It’s great!

Staycation.

Where to begin?! We had a four day mini staycation which spanned from Friday-Monday. Throughout those four days, I planned various activities for Emerson and I around our city. It was really nice, but exhausting! I think I wore Emerson out to the point of him becoming miserable by the end of our last day. Note to self: leave some room for down time!

Day #1: We started the day off at home with a big breakfast. Emerson slept in until about 7am, which was nice for me. We headed out of the house around 10:30am and went to a local dairy place that makes its own ice cream. They also have a small petting zoo with goats/lambs that you can feed, a playground, and mini golf. We utilized all and had a nice time. No, Emerson didn’t really golf. Instead, he tossed his ball into one of the water features they had set up throughout the golf course. He still had a good time running around though.

Afterwards, we headed over to my parent’s house to swim for a while. After an hour, or so, we headed home, so that Emerson could take a late nap. When he awoke, we headed over to the fair, which was set up for our community day. My sister came with us. Emerson rode all of the rides, had a slushy, and I even won him a stuffed animal. He was pretty worn out by the time we got home. I let him stay up later than usual because we were on vacation.

Day #2: Emerson slept until about 8:30am! It was nice because we had all day plans at the water park (Sandcastle). We picked my sister up around 10:45am, then headed down to the park. The gates opened at 11. The weather was already so hot. We had a blast! Season passes was definitely the right way to go. We also bought a parking pass, so now, anytime we go, it is completely FREE. We swam in all of the pools. Emerson went down a few water slides and loved the wave pool! We were there for about 4 hours from 11am-4pm. We certainly got our money’s worth. Afterwards, we headed to my parent’s house. Emerson snoozed on the couch for a bit before we headed home. I let him stay up late again too. We watched a movie and hung out until bath and bedtime. We were both exhausted after a long day in the sun.

Day #3: I wanted to take Emerson around Pittsburgh for a day of fun. My sister came with us. We parked in my old neighborhood in Mt. Washington, then walked up to the overlook to see the entire city. It was awesome. Afterwards, we stopped at little dairy place to get Emerson an ice cream, then headed down to South Side where Emerson played in one of the fountains. He was soaked!  We stopped for lunch on the way home, then headed to my parent’s house to swim. It was so hot out! Em was beat by the time we got home.

Day #4: Emerson slept in until well after 8am. I could tell when he woke up that the exhaustion was really creeping up on him. We had one more day planned of fun. We went back to Sandcastle! We were there for about three hours. Both of us were just absolutely exhausted. We ended up going home where Emerson napped for over two hours. I even laid down for a bit. We finished the day in the yard. I filled Em’s pool up and we just hung out. I put Emerson to bed earlier than usual because he was grouchy from exhaustion.

Overall, it was a really nice break for the both of us. We’re doing this again next month and will be taking two days off during the week (a Tuesday and Wednesday). I think that’ll be a bit more manageable than taking time off with the weekend. It was a lot of days and I crammed in a lot of stuff. I’ll tone it down a bit next time.

This week, we are just getting back into the swing of things. We’re going to the spray park on Saturday and doing Sandcastle on Sunday. The 4th is on Monday, so we’ll be heading to my parent’s to cook out, swim, and do fireworks. Other than that, I just want to save our dollars. We didn’t spend much money over the weekend. Our Pittsburgh day was 100% free outside of paying for ice cream and lunch. Sandcastle has already paid for itself. Swimming at my parents was no cost. I spent $11 the day we went to the creamery for ice cream and golf. I planned pretty well. I am savvy with a dollar. LOL

My nephew comes back from California next month. We’re saving all of our excursions for that time. I’m excited. I have it all planned out. I just want to give Emerson a nice summer. He has been driving me crazy lately though. I’m not sure what is up with him. With a flip of a switch, he will just start crying and screaming. The smallest things upset him. Yesterday, he was upset that I wouldn’t let him drive my car. Really?! You’re 2! No, you can’t sit in the front seat and pretend drive! He flipped for about 15 minutes in the backseat until I finally yelled at him to cut it out. I hate when he brings me out of character and I have to seriously YELL. After 15 minutes of wailing though, I had reached my breaking point. He stopped the second I raised my voice, but I feel bad now. I don’t like that feeling. Granted, I know he can’t be an angel all of the time, but DANG! I think by the end of the four days, we both just needed space from one another. I’ll chalk it up to that. This morning, he wigged out when I left him at daycare though, so of course, I felt even worse.

Alright, guys. I am gonna finish up. have a super week!

This is 2 days old

We had an amazing weekend. On Friday, my sister picked Emerson up from daycare for me and took him over to Luciano’s where my family was for my nephew’s going away dinner. I met everyone there once I was done with work. It was delicious! Emerson sat so well at the restaurant even though it took us awhile to get our food. He barely touched his pizza, but when we got home, I offered him some leftovers and he scarfed it down.

On Saturday, we woke up early and got all of our errands done. Then, we met my sister and nephew at the spray park. Wow, it was adorable! Emerson was a bit gun shy at first. The water was cold, so it was pretty understandable that he didn’t want to immediately run in. Once he got wet and warmed up some, he was all over the place. We were there for about 1.5 hours. Afterwards, we visited my parents, then headed home. Emerson took a nap, while I fired up the grill, and filled up his pool. We played in the yard for the remainder of the day.

Sunday was father’s day as you all know. We woke up early, ran some last minute errands, put my dad’s gift together, then headed to my parent’s for a full day at the lake. We are all burnt, but it was totally worth it and so much fun. Dad loved all of his gifts. We all had such a great day. We brought a big picnic, all of our rafts, sand toys, and a tent to cover our picnic table. It was absolutely perfect. We spent 5 hours on the lake. Em loved it after he got used to the squishy sand in the water. At first, he kept whining and crying to be picked up. I’d pick him up, then he’d want right back down again. It was driving me insane! Eventually, he was fine. He swam in the water with his floaties and in his shark raft. Everyone took turns taking him around, which was nice for me. I got a bit of a break too. The whining was in full force though. I think it was because he had missed his nap and was tired. It honestly was driving me nuts, so by the end of the day, I was ready to go home. Kids! Afterwards, we went to my parent’s house for a bit.  Em was exhausted and snoozed in the car on the way home. He lounged on my parent’s couch watching cartoons for an hour when we got home. His poor face is so red even though I constantly lathered him up in sunscreen.

This week, we’re playing it pretty low-key. I’m so happy to be back to my regular work schedule. We got our sandcastle waterpark passes, so we’re planning a trip for Saturday and Monday. On Sunday, we’re heading down to the water steps, which should be a good time. It’s also free. We’re off on Friday and Monday, so on Friday, we’re just swimming at my parent’s house. I’ll probably take Emerson to the spray park again too. It’ll be an eventful weekend. I’m trying to balance and do enough without spending so much money. Going to Sandcastle twice this week will already pay for the pass itself. The pass was $50.00. One time entry into the park is $34.99, so we’re already getting our money’s worth. It’s crazy how much we’ve already done this summer and it barely just started. We still have so much on our summer bucket list to do.

Alright, I hope all of you fathers out there who actually see and take care of your children had a wonder father’s day. You deserve it!