Much better

Yesterday, I had an interview for a promotion within my team. I think it went well. I know my supervisor has several more interviews to conduct before narrowing it down before the second round of interviews begin. I really hope I get this position. It would be a bump in pay, which is obviously one of the main factors that I’m applying, but it would be a challenge and an opportunity to grow my career. This would be a major stepping stone for me that would open more doors down the line. Cross your fingers and toes, please?!

Emerson’s occupational therapist contacted me yesterday with positive feedback. She said that she sees a lot of growth with Emerson and that he is progressing. That made me feel better considering I was feeling frustrated yesterday. Last night, he behaved perfectly. He had no aggressive outbursts at all. I put a yoga ball in the living room. He was bouncing on it, while eating snack and watching t.v. It’s funny to watch small changes occur just from offering a sensory outlet in our living room. I’m sure a lot of you are shaking your heads and thinking I am full of crap, but I don’t care. You don’t live in our home, nor do you personally know my son, or see his struggles. I can tell that this type of therapy is beneficial, so I am going to forge ahead with offering more sensory options in our home in hopes that it really aids in what he is seeking. The ball is a bit on the large side though, which makes it difficult for him to use properly. He does have fun climbing and falling off, but having something he can sit and bounce on would be better. I’m keeping my eyes out for something smaller. On Friday, I’m picking up a mini trampoline. I think he’ll enjoy that a lot. The one I found has a handlebar for safety. The price isn’t bad at all. I found it at Walmart for $26. I hope they have it in store, or I’m going to have to order it online, which sucks. I don’t want to have to wait for it to be delivered. I’m also going to pick up a mini handheld massager. Apparently kiddos seeking this type of sensory output like the vibrations. This makes complete sense now because he is obsessed with holding my electric toothbrush. They are fairly cheap and fall somewhere around the $6 mark. Between the trampoline, ball, and massager, we should be in good shape for a while until I can get the other things that we need for our room.

It was pretty incredible to watch last night though now that I am more aware of what is going on in his mind.  I picked him up from my sister’s house because she had to grab him for me from daycare. We hung there for a bit before heading home. When we walked in the door, I let the dog out to pee, then turned the tv on. It was already 7pm, which meant bath and bed were looming. He watched tv for a bit, while bouncing on his ball. He walked over to his toy area, grabbed all of his Little People and his Little People Plane, then played quietly in the living room. I guess he got all that he needed from the ball, was content, and able to move onto some quieter play. Typically, he is extremely wound up, cannot calm himself down, and will become very aggressive towards the dog. Yes, he will watch tv and play with toys intermittently, but he still has that aggression through kicking, gauging, and hitting. He directs this towards me at times too, or he will want to rough house. I have a no rough house rule when it’s that close to bedtime either. I don’t like getting him wound up. He usually cannot calm himself down and then it spirals from there. I had to do nothing last night. I gave him the tools that he needed and he handled the rest. Do I think it’ll always go this smoothly? No, but I am happy that I am putting forth the effort and he is being receptive to it.

I just want to clarify something. Emerson is a completely normal kid. If you met him and saw him in action, he’d steal your heart. He is a cute patootie, so loveable, and silly. He has a wild streak though, which gets him into trouble. He gets overly excited and his affection can quickly turn to aggression. All we’re trying to do is show him ways to calm himself down, and to get what he is seeking in a healthy, safe way without potentially harming himself, or other people. If you saw him, you’d say “He’s being 2”, but now that I know what is going on, I can say “No, he is seeking <insert sensory issue here>”. Once he has that need met, he calms down, moves on, and is fine.

He has a therapy session today with his OT. She is going to pay close attention to see what triggers the excitement in him, which is really driving the aggressive behavior. We’re thinking if we can catch it first, then we can try to prevent it, or at least control it more. I’ve been doing the same at home. I think what gets him excited is me. I am a naturally loud person. I am extremely silly and I’ll burst out into song for no apparent reason. I think he feeds off of my energy. Once he is so far gone, that’s it. Last night, I was sure to stay in a calm manner. I wasn’t overly excited, or loud. I kept my sillies to a normal level.  Anyway, I am going to continue to do what I am doing, take tips from the OT, and just be positive that the changes we’re making will help Emerson to better process his senses! More to come.

The last two mornings, I’ve ran before work. I did 2.5 miles both days. I really want to push for that third mile. I’m going to give it a whirl on Friday. I used to do 3 miles with such ease. It’s crazy having to climb back up. I enjoy running a lot. I’m not trying to run marathons, or anything, but I do have a goal of being able to run at least 5 miles. I know it’ll take me some time to get up to that, but I’m going to work towards it. My plan is to drive to work on Friday, so that I can have even more time to run. That way, I can still have enough time to shower and get ready at the gym before work. Right now, running 2.5 miles and getting ready for work is putting me at the 45 minute mark. I’ve been taking an early lunch, which only allots me 45 minutes. I’ll need a little more time if I’m pushing for that third mile. Right now, it takes me about 8.5 minutes to run 1 mile. Sometimes a little less. The last two mornings, It’s take me about 21-22 min to run 2.5 miles. Adding in another half shouldn’t take me too much longer, but I’d like some extra time just in case. LOL.  I really want to lose the pesky pounds I’ve put on over the last few months. It’s only noticeable in my bum and thighs, which is so annoying. Everything else stayed the same for the most part. I half want to blame it on all of the lifting. I know those squats had A LOT to do with this. I just don’t like it. I’ve stopped squatting and have cut my leg days down to like nothing. I’m doing extra cardio now, which is why I’ve picked up more running. I think this will do the trick. I can get the stronger, leaner legs back that I had before I decided to get into heavy lifting. I miss that. I’ll continue to lift to work my upper body. I love my arms and I don’t mind that they have so much muscle. Running should lean out the rest of me though, which I won’t be mad about. I need to clean up my diet though. I fell off pretty hard the last month. It feels good to have ran the last two mornings though. I forgot what that felt like. It’s very addicting, but in a good way.

Alright, that’s all I have for today. I do feel a lot better today though J