Mummy is stressing

Yesterday, I went to pick Emerson up at daycare early. The roads weren’t great, so I waited until a salt truck/plow came down my street, then I took my chance and picked him up. My poor heart cannot take another drive in this weather. I know, I know. You are all sick of me talking about this. Trust me, I wish I didn’t have to. Today, on the way to daycare, I noticed my brakes squealing. GREAT….I texted my dad and let him know, so that he can have his car guy replace my brakes immediately. THIS SUCKS! I’m so fucking afraid to go to daycare later to pick Emerson up. On top of that, we are out of pretty much everything. I desperately need to go to the store, but I’m even more afraid to drive now. My head hurts. I just feel so stressed out. My paycheck was short too. Last week when I had to leave work early 2 days because Emerson was throwing up, I didn’t use personal time to cover the hours. My boss said that I could make up the time. I assumed that meant I’d work extra hours and not log them to avoid getting overtime, but that he’d put me in the system for my regular time. That’s how we typically handle things like this. Well, he didn’t do that. I ended up having lost time on my paycheck for several hours, which makes me SICK. Even with a full paycheck, I was barely scraping by this time because I have to pay to renew my car registration and my gas bill was over $200. The only bill I can even play around with is my gas bill. So, I’m going to pay half of it this paycheck and the other half next paycheck. It’ll only end up being 8 days late. I HATE having to do that, but I have no other choice. The only good thing is the extra hours I am working this week will be logged as overtime on my next paycheck. It just makes me sick though.

 

I’m trying so fucking hard to be upbeat. I really, really am. Typically, I am. I try to not sweat the small stuff, but I’m starting to crack. It’s the weather and the stress of driving that’s sending me over the edge. I just don’t want anything else to go wrong. It has been a crazy ass year so far with Emerson and I being sick multiple times, the weather,  money, and now my car. I haven’t gotten my income tax yet either, which means getting a new car is further delayed. At this point, I’m just trying to figure out how I can get a car without that money. I’ve shed more tears this week than I have in the last 6 months. The beginning of the year is always so damn tight with money. It’s even worse now because I have additional expenses with daycare. I know if I can just make it until April, it’ll be okay. Can everyone please, please say a prayer for us? We can use all the extra ones we can get at this point.

 

It’s always hard to see the rainbow when you’re in the middle of the storm. I’m trying so hard to look on the bright side and every other cliché that would apply to this situation. It’s easier said than done though. I hate feeling this stressed out. It makes me so sick to my stomach. Alright, I’m going end this here and to stop complaining. I hope you all have a good day.