Last night was rough. That’s an understatement. I’m too tired to come up with a stronger word though, so that’ll have to do. Sorry for the lack of cleverness and wit in this blog. I have no idea what is going on. I think it’s a mix of teething and Emerson being on the cusp of walking. He was such a bear last night. Around 5pm, he started flipping out. I don’t even mean normal flipping. I’m talking full on tantrum. Flipping himself on the ground, throwing his head back, and crying. What?! I’ve never seen him act this way. He was very tired, so I rocked him and put him down for a nap. It was closing in on 7pm and I started to get worried. I didn’t want to let him nap too long for the fear that he’d be up half the night. I was pretty tired, but didn’t sleep when he napped because I wanted to get everything ready for work and daycare today.
He finally woke up around 7. I brought him downstairs where we played for a bit. When he started to show me that he was tired, we headed for the tub. He was still grouchy in the tub. I even added extra bubbles to the water to lighten the mood. No go. I took him out, put his diaper on, and toweled him off. He was still cranky, so we headed for bed. Fast forward to an hour later. He was NOT asleep. What?! He was showing major signs of being tired, which is the only reason I even tried to get him down. We ended up back in the living room around 830pm. He was a ball of energy. I kept thinking to myself, “Boy, I’m glad we came downstairs. You don’t seem tired at all” Anyway, he played for about 45 minutes. He started flipping out again, throwing his head back, rubbing his eyes, and just being out of control with tiredness. I took my cue and headed up to bed. What a joke. An hour passed and he was still not asleep, but very tired. By this point, I was at my wit’s end. He was punching me, kicking me, gauging me, and just being ridiculous, so I put him in his playpen and went downstairs. He cried for 14 minutes. It was probably the longest 14 minutes I’ve had in a really long time. It was honestly heart breaking to hear him crying out “mum, ma, mama!” I am not a fan of cry it out at all. I don’t believe in it, but I do believe in taking a step back when I need a break. I don’t have another set of hand’s either, so the playpen is a good back up. He wasn’t hungry, sick, or didn’t need changed, so I knew he was just crying from being tired. After 14 minutes of wailing, I picked him up, put him on the boob, and nursed him to sleep. He slept for 4 hours. Around 2am, he was up again and freaking out. He didn’t want the boob, or anything. He was just being so out of control. After about 15 minutes, I was able to get him back down. He slept until I woke him up around 640am. I had to get up at 6 even though I did sleep in and made it into work late. Luckily, I had packed everything the night before, so it wasn’t too bad. He was none too pleased when I woke him up. I try to dress him as quietly and quickly as possible. I don’t wake him on purpose. He just always wakes up, which means his sleep is crazy interrupted, which aids in a cranky baby.
I have no idea what is going on. I think it’s a mixture of teething and just progressing and developing. He’s been freestanding a lot lately, which tells me he’s ready to take that first step very soon. He’s been chewing any and everything too. Motrin and Tylenol don’t seem to be helping though. In fact, anything I try doesn’t see to sooth that pain. He just lashes out. I hope whatever teeth are coming in make an appearance soon. I’m ready to get back to our regularly scheduled program. I hate that things will be good for a short time and then we all have to suffer. The dog was so sick of Emerson last night that she slept downstairs alone! I wish the easy nights lasted longer than the hard nights. I know it’s all a part of the experience and process, but I hate when we go through lulls like this. I hope things ease up a bit before Thanksgiving. I just want his first Thanksgiving to be a great one. It won’t be if he’s cranky from this awful sleeping pattern.
When I picked Emerson up from daycare on Friday, I had a notice telling me that if I didn’t verify his shot records by 11/26/2014 (two days from now), his care would be suspended. Wow, talk about short notice. He was just at the doctor’s on 11/03/2014. The daycare never asks me for anything, so I never think about it when I take him. I have to get a paper filled out and signed by the doctor. This really pisses me off. Our ped’s office is about 30 minutes away. It’s not exactly around the corner, so it’ll take us an hour round trip, plus the time we spend there. On top of that, Emerson is due back at the doctor for a checkup at the beginning of December, which means we’ll be driving out there again in two weeks. I called this morning and asked if they could just fax his records to the daycare. I was told “No!” Thanks, Hippa privacy law. If I say the records can be faxed, then I don’t see what the big deal is. I authorized it. It’s just one more thing that we have to do. He isn’t going to daycare on Wednesday, which is the day the records are due. I’m going to get them over the weekend to have for Monday. I’m not running up to the doctor’s tonight, or tomorrow night when he won’t be at daycare anyway. If they have a problem with that, then I will probably have to go off. Start asking for shit and giving reasonable timelines instead of springing stuff on me the week of a holiday. I love his daycare, but sometimes they really piss me the fuck off. I bought a Thanksgiving Day card for the staff and am going to make a treat to send tomorrow. Things like this make me not want to be nice, but it isn’t his teacher’s fault. It’s the director for being slow on her shit. I’m a first time mother. I don’t know that I should be sending updated shit ALL the time. From now on, anytime we go to the doctor’s office, I’m getting a paper just in case.
We actually did have a good weekend in spite of the bad sleeping patterns. On Friday, we did nothing aside from hanging out at home. I can’t even remember if he slept well, or not. I think he slept like shit. If he didn’t, I’d be surprised. The days all seem to run together anyway. On Saturday, the roads were completely icy and the city was pretty much shut down. All of the bridges were closed due to multiple accidents from the random ice. The weather warmed up, but it brought rain, which froze. Ridiculous. Luckily, the roads all cleared and we were able to go to my cousin’s house. Emerson had a great time playing with all of the kids. It’s so cute watching him interact. We all had such a great time. Afterwards, we went to my parent’s house. Emerson was beat, so he slept, while I ate dinner. He was not too happy when it was time to go back into the car seat to go home. He slept like crap when we did go to bed on Saturday night. Are we seeing a trend here? Sunday, we woke up around 730am. He played for about an hour before becoming so overcome with sleepiness. He went right down for a nap and ended up sleeping for almost 2 hours. When he woke up, I made chocolate banana pancakes for breakfast. Yum! We ate and played awhile. We made plans to head to the mall with my sister. After breakfast, I got Emerson all cleaned up. Britt came over and we all headed to the mall for about 3 hours. It was fun. Emerson became so overly tired, that he was fussing a bit in his stroller. I ended up walking around and holding him until he conked out, then put him back in the stroller. He had a decent-sized nap. We went back home and had an early dinner. We played a bit, and that’s when everything happened last night. Early nap turned late, which ended up overriding our normal bedtime. I just hope this phase passes quickly. I hate to dwell and constantly come back on this, but it has been our life all weekend.
Let’s talk about our week. I have to make two wreaths by the weekend. A Pittsburgh Steeler wreath and an Angel wreath. The good thing is I have to drop the wreaths off near Emerson’s pediatrician, so I can kill two birds with one stone. I am just realizing this right now and I’m actually happy now! I can get his papers AND drop these wreaths off. Hallelujah! Okay, I feel less annoyed. Outside of that, I believe Britt is coming to stay the night on Wednesday. We’re going to decorate the Christmas tree that I plan on putting in the dining room. I just will feel so bad if Britt is there trying to sleep and Emerson is flipping out and not sleeping. Although it might be nice to have an extra person on hand. We will play it by ear. We’re also going to make the dishes that we’re bringing to dinner at our parent’s house on Thanksgiving. We’ll probably make some kind of place setting for everyone too. We’re not going out during the black Friday madness. I’m going to wait to check out the cyber Monday deals to see if anything I need to buy as gifts is on sale. I’m sure I’ll get some kind of a break. My sister will have my nephew this weekend, so maybe we can do dinner, or something one of those nights.
Speaking of my sister, her and her fiancé are no longer together. They broke up a few days ago. To me, it seemed like a long time coming. I’m not sure if they’ll reconcile, or not. He’s taken the ring back before, but quickly returned it. This time, she isn’t accepting his apology, or return of the ring, which I’m glad to hear. Not only that, but she is not moving into the house that they just got together. Instead, she had her name removed from the lease and is staying put at my parent’s house. I’m glad. With all of the back and forth, who’s to say it won’t happen while they’re living together. She told him they can work it out if he shows a drastic change. I just don’t foresee that happening. I want her to be happy and I especially want my nephew to have a stable home. He has that now. I just don’t know that her ex can provide that, especially with how quickly he seems to give, then take away. I feel like he isn’t ready for all that comes with proposing to a woman. He seems to gallivant a lot, go out a lot, and disrespects the hell out of my sister. He doesn’t strike me as the type that is ready to settle down and be a family man. Being engaged, he shouldn’t be doing half of what he does do, especially when it’s directly disrespecting my sister. I’ve learned that you need to let people make their own choices though. I’m so proud of her for rising above and making the choice to not move in with this man. I have no idea how it’ll turn out, but I’m happy she put her foot down. I just hope she carries that through. You can’t make someone change though. He knows what he has and he clearly knows what he is doing to jeopardize that. It appears that he wants the best of both worlds. A fiancée and family at home, but the freedom to run all over town and be his own person. She tries so hard to be on her best behavior and not tick him off, which is no way to leave. He has so much power over her head with the ring and his car. She was using his car, while he was away at work. He actually sent his brother over to my parent’s house to get the keys. Even leaving someone stranded like that is not okay. He just seems to care about what he can take away instead of working on himself to better the relationship. He still doesn’t think he’s done anything wrong either. I won’t put what happened in here though. It isn’t my place, but I do hope that she can stay empowered and do what is right for her and my nephew.
So, I bought a dress on Friday afternoon for Thanksgiving. It’s quite formfitting. I don’t know if I should even wear it. I posted a picture of myself in it on Facebook and some of the comments I received weren’t so nice. I received some messages too about my plummeting weight. People are so harsh at times. I bought a different dress that is more flowey yesterday, so I have to return one or the other. I don’t really like the one I bought yesterday, but it makes me look fatter, which will probably deter some nasty comments. I wish people would shut the fuck up about it. I shouldn’t feel like I CAN’T post pictures on facebook because people will scrutinize my weight. I plan on eating like a pig on Thanksgiving too. Maybe I should post pictures of that, so people stop accusing me of having some weird eating disorder. I was even asked “Are you that skinny, or did you photo shop this?” Yes, I photo shop all of my photos, so that I look really thin with a big head, so that people can poke fun at me. To that person’s credit though, they followed up with a nice comment, so I can’t really be mad about that. Other people are still being super mean though, but whatever. This isn’t going to last forever. On a plus side though, I was able to fit into a kid-size dress yesterday! Super cute AND way cheaper!
Oh, I forgot about this, but on Friday night, at bed time, Emerson puked like a bucket’s worth all over me, the entire bed, pillows, EVERYTHING. It was INSANE. Projectile vomiting. I don’t know what the hell happened! It was just flowing and flowing! He couldn’t stop! I felt so freaking bad! All I could do was just hold him. He was literally vomiting all over the fucking place. I was completely drenched in puke. I’ve had dryer showers. It was absolutely unreal. Poor kiddo. He had it coming out of his nose too. Afterwards, he was just so upset. I can’t believe I forgot about this. I was in absolute shock. It was just the craziest scene. I got everything cleaned up, mattress cleaned up, new bedding, pjs, etc. Poor kiddo. I have no idea what happened. He didn’t have a fever, or anything, so I’m thinking he was just really full. After that, he did sleep though. I felt so bad. The amount of puke was just incredible.
Alright, I think I’ve wrote enough today. I hope you guys all have a really great Monday!
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