Yesterday, my mom and I got into an argument. Well, not even an argument. Not much was really said. That’s sort of the way our arguments go. I feel a certain way, but I can’t express it because she takes everything so offensively. On the flip side, she doesn’t tell you how she feels. Instead, she is short with you, gives you dirty looks, or just doesn’t say anything at all. It’s really annoying.
I took the baby over to my parent’s house yesterday because the previous day they asked if I was bringing him over. To me, that signified that they wanted to spend time with him. They never come to our house, which would make things a lot easier. They have no toys at their house, it isn’t baby proofed, and they have nothing that we can put the baby in to contain him to play. Their house is small, so there isn’t a lot of room for the baby to move and play without trying to climb on chairs, touch the stove, etc. It’s a lot more work for me. Anyway, when we got there, my mom was playing a game on her computer. She barely looked up when we walk through the door. Now, we all know I’ve griped about this before, so it’s nothing new. The baby was due for some medicine, so I asked her to hold him, so that I could get it out and give it to him. After about 3 minutes, she asked my sister if she wanted to hold the baby. My mom went back to playing her game on her computer and that was it. She never acknowledged the baby again, held him, played with him, nothing. My sister held the baby for about 5 minutes and then handed him back when he got fussy. At this point, I’m asking myself why I even put the poor kid into his car seat and dragged him over to their house when we could have stayed home and played with his toys.
While we were there, my mom was just acting so crabby! It was annoying. She was mad at my dad for making pulled pork because the pork didn’t get soft enough to fall off into pieces, so she’d have to cut it. She threw a fit and said dinner was ruined. Really? Be happy that someone even makes your ass dinner. She was so crappy after that, then it just went downhill after. I decided to leave because it was pointless being over there. I was just standing there holding the baby. Literally, STANDING and holding the baby. I put him in his car seat and he freaked out. My mom goes “He doesn’t want to be in the car seat” Well no shit! How else would she like me to transport him back to my house? I made a comment that maybe if they’d come visit I wouldn’t have to bring him back and forth when we all know he hates his seat. She starts talking to him and I snapped at her and told her to not talk to him when he’s in his seat and ready to leave. Talk to and play with him when he’s out of the seat and sitting here waiting for you to interact with him. It’s just ridiculous!
She isn’t talking to me now, but I honestly do not care. I am so sick of being expected to come to their house every weekend when they never return the favor. We only live 8 minutes (if that) apart from each other. If they want me to come over so much, then they are going to have to invest in some baby items and some baby proofing too. More importantly, actually interact with your grandson. They want me to play with him and hold him while they just shout out “hey buddy!” from across the room. No! That is not good enough. I just don’t get it.
I think I need to lower my expectations. It’s just exhausting and I don’t know why I put them before me. I shouldn’t have to maintain anyone’s relationship with Emerson. The responsibility should lie with them, not me. If you honestly can’t spend an hour with your grandson without your computer, or handing him back to me after 2 minutes, then something is wrong. It’s just sickening to me. I don’t get it. I understand he’s a lot of work and on the go, but so what. These are the times they’ll wish they had back when he’s older. I need a break from the family this week. It honestly depresses me and I don’t have time for that. I can’t tell you the last time my mom has even seen the baby outside of their house. She never goes anywhere with us, or even asks to take him anywhere. Nothing will change until I realize and accept the way things are though.
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